Frustrated by writer’s block

I quit my job a few months ago to focus on music, and I’m not exactly happy with how it’s going. It hasn’t been entirely negative, but it’s challenging, at least.

I’ve been trying to write a specific choral piece for a while now, and I just feel so out of practice, no matter how much I try. Everything I come up with sounds totally bland to me, and I can’t zero in on something worth building the piece around.

The feeling of “getting” music in the way a musician ought to naturally feels increasingly nebulous. I still enjoy listening to music, but not in the intense, focused way I used to. Without a solid grasp on that feeling, it’s difficult to get interested in the work of writing.

Part of the problem is I’m not making enough music with others. The reciprocal aspect of music is critical, and something I appreciate now more than I used to.

I’m also frustrated with how this blog is going. This is the second time I’ve tried to start a music blog, and I still don’t feel like I’m capturing much of all these ideas I felt like I had floating around in my head. I want to stay committed to the process for now, because I do believe the value will come if I give it enough time, but it’s not an easy stage to push through.

This post is mostly for myself, probably. It might be interesting to come back to when I’m feeling better (getting over illness and allergies right now).